Emotion Gumbo - Losing Our Jobs Part 1

Today has been a crazy up and down, all around, reconnect with your emotions kind of day.

This morning my boss pulled me aside and simply said "We are letting you go." I must admit, I never saw this coming. Ever. There was no warning. No "you might lose your job if..." No hint that anything was slightly amiss. As he proceeded to give me what I felt to be a somewhat confusing and less than satisfactory explanation, all I could think was that this must be some kind of joke. Any minute now someone was going to come in and say, "Oh man! You should have seen your face!!"

About 10 minutes after I was told that I no longer had a job, I was informed that my husband was also being let go. They were firing both of us. Their reason for letting him go? His relationship with me (well, that was what I was told. Word for word. Matt was told that he would not be able to support us on his salary alone and THAT was why he was fired).

And that was it. No paperwork. I gathered my things from the office - the computer with the emails left unanswered. The jacket and scarf that had only been taken off an hour before. The breakfast that never got eaten. The Sugar Plum Spice tea (I was so excited about that...) that I never got to drink. And then I went home. And Matt and I sat. And we cried. And we prayed. And cried some more. I literally got dehydrated from crying so much.

We know God has a purpose. We know He has a plan. We know He is good. And He will provide. We want to honor and glorify Him through this. We want to have full faith that we will find jobs and a place to live (did I mention we were told that we no longer have a house? We have to move by December 15).

We have to trust that my boss really does believe he made the right decision. We have to believe that he really did pray about it. But there are so many questions left unanswered. Why was I never told anything was wrong? Why was there no warning? Why was it handled this way? How did it seem like the right thing to do to fire a newlywed couple and kick them out of their house? At Christmastime, even?

Last night I had a dream. I've always thought that God occasionally reveals things to me through dreams. I remember dreaming something about Habakkuk 3:6. I didn't know what it said. I just knew it was really important. So when I woke up I read it:

"When He stops the earth shakes. When He looks the nations tremble. He shatters the everlasting mountains and levels the eternal hills. He is the Eternal One!"

This is the God Matt and I serve. This is the God that is taking care of us. This is the God who loves us.

And then I turned the page over and read this, not knowing how true it would be of my life just one short hour later:

"Even though the fig trees have no blossoms, and there are no grapes on the vines; even though the olive crop fails and the fields lie empty and barren; even though the flocks die in the fields, and the cattle barns are empty, yet I will rejoice in the Lord! I will be joyful in the God of my salvation! The Sovereign Lord is my strength! He makes me as surefooted as a deer, able to tread upon the heights."
Habakkuk 3:17-19

Even though we lost our jobs and we lost our home; even though we lost our community and we lost our friends, we must choose joy. The Lord IS sovereign and He WILL enable us to make it through this. Even so, we would greatly appreciate your prayers.

Comments

Lauren said…
Oh my. I am so, so sorry to hear this. It completely and utterly sucks.

You are right though. God does have a purpose and a plan and in the midst of everything it seems bleak and wretched but one day- maybe not tomorrow, or next week, or next month- but one day, you will look back to now and see how God had a plan in all of this. In the meantime though? It sucks, and I am so sorry. You guys are in my prayers.
Lauren said…
P.S. I read the following quote just yesterday on the blog of a foreign language professor from LSU. She and 13 other FL professors were fired because of "budget shortcomings," but were the only faculty in the entire university affected (this did not in any way significantly offset the budget problems- in other words- it was a cop out by LSU). While it isn't stated from a Biblical perspective, I think it can be read with one. So as you read it, just think: God has a plan for my life.

From the blog:

"The lesson of this story: Don't get too comfortable. Relish your job, your marriage, your life. Do your best, but always be aware that your circumstances may change. Always have a back-up plan.



Sit down tonight, and answer the question "What would I do if I got fired tomorrow?" And if you are in the uncomfortable position of being unemployed, ask yourself, "What do I have to do to make this situation better?" Life-changing events like these test our mettle, but also open up opportunities that we never dreamed possible"

God know those opportunities you might have never thought possible. Again- this all completely sucks and maybe it would've been better had it never happened- but closed doors means you get to do and try new/other things. That's a benefit at least.
Whitney said…
Hey.

I've been there. We've been there. Daniel lost his job twice in one year. This was during our son's surgeries - we had to move to NY with his parents because of it.

And it royally, really, truly, sucks.


It did get better, eventually. We found a home again and it was good.

It will be good. I promise.
My goodness...Lauren, I will be praying! I absolutely LOVE your attitude. It's so encouraging to me; so realize, in the midst of despair, your attitude and actions are a witness to those around you :-) God holds you both in the palm of His hand and will take care of You :-) Praying!
Linda said…
I am sorry to hear about all of this Lauren. Please know that you and Matt will be in my prayers.
Grrr, I kinda want to call your boss and chew him out (to put it midly). I often think Christian business is the lowest functioning kind. But yet you humble me with your post and choosing joy over bitterness. Keep the attitude and you two will be fine, ever better off then you were!
You can also tell your boss that your friend who has some influence in this field, his opinion of camp eagle has dropped a lot.
-Luke
Wow, this sucks so much! I can't believe that they never approached you about giving you a chance to fix any personal issues or whatever before just "letting you go" like that-- at Christmastime, no less! (That happened to us too and I was so stinkin' mad about it, how uncaring! but even we had a tad more time than you were given). This is truly rediculous, I am so angry for you right now! I hate it when things like this get handled so poorly.

I know that in the long run God will provide and you guys will be even better off (we've lived thru that ourselves too) but even so, the emotions you have to wade through first are something awful. Man, I wish I had all the answers for ya, I hate to see you go thru this! Maybe it helps at least a tiny little bit to know that we're all behind ya. Let us know if there's anything we can do for you in addition to praying.

-KIT

Oh and as for what Luke said about our opinion of Camp Eagle going down-- yeah, and my kids were disappointed their new slap bracelets fell apart already too!
Unknown said…
We love you and we are praying for you and you have not lost us as friends, we will be there for you in every way we can through this 'transition' for a lack of better words.

Always,
Josh & Meredith
Lauren said…
Matt and I really are touched by all the support - thank you guys so much for your prayers and your kind words.

Whitney - that sounds horrible! I am sorry that happened to you guys. Thank you for your encouragement, though.

Luke and Kit - Ironic, isn't it? Shall we begin singing Alanis Morisette? Ha... Anyway, thanks for standing up for us. You have no idea how much that means to us.

Josh - well, you already know anything I would probably say. That, and I've probably already said it ;)

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