Thursday, 17 April 2008


today is one of those low self esteem days. you know, the kind that seems to crush your spirit? to be honest, i still don't really know how to handle these days. i know i still handle them in the wrong way. i don't know how to change that. i know i just need to hand it over to God and let Him deal with it, and i know that's hard for me. so now what?

Saturday, 5 April 2008


my future is so unsure. i don't even know if i'm guaranteed tomorrow! God willing, i finish up school in a little less than 3 weeks (!!!), work, take summer school, be in my best friend's wedding, and move home until i graduate. once i graduate, i have no idea where God will lead me. sometimes this is really exciting for me, and at other times it is incrediby frustrating! i am so curious! so eager! so excited! and yet, i don't want to grow up. why is it hard to trust God with this? i know He has it under control. i know He knows best. and yet, i want to take it into my own hands. or at least know what's going on. gotta be patient!!!
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